Infant Innocence

[The first in a series of nonsensical rhymes, this was written in a particularly boring double lecture, with a little help from my dear friend Noel. Just how bored we were is for everyone to see.!]

The Grizzly Bear is huge and wild,
He hath devoured the infant child;

The infant child is not aware-
She has been eaten by the bear.

Yet, the child is playful and gay,
All she wondered was how night came from day.

In the bear’s stomach, a fluid oozes,
And covers the child in digestive juices;

So, deep inside the Grizzly’s tummy,
The girl started screaming for her mummy.

Through his food-pipe, echoed her voice;
The ground rumbled with the ensuing noise.

This sound fell on the ears of a hunter,
Who picked up his rifle, and came with a canter.

Yards away, he loaded his gun,
And pulled the trigger, ending the bear’s fun.

The bullet fled like a speeding dart,
And settled in the poor bear’s heart.

It had nearly missed the infant’s head,
But struck the mighty Grizzly dead.

The hunter, the Grizzly’s stomach slit,
And was shocked to find his daughter in it!

She was covered from head to toe in slime,
He had, it seemed, reached just in time.

The hunter tied the Grizzly well,
And dragged him along to where he dwelt.

His wife, on seeing this deadly sight,
Screamed and almost died in fright;

It wasn’t the vision of the gruesome bear,
But of her goo-some daughter that gave her the scare!

She gave her child a bubble bath,
Her husband cooked a bubbling broth.

And so, the hunter, wife and daughter,
Had bear and beer for that day’s supper.

The infant child is meek and mild,
And now, she hath eaten the Grizzly wild;

The Grizzly Bear is unaware-

He has become the infant’s fare.